Lust: Some Things We Should Deny

What do you think about when you hear the word deny? For most of us, hearing the word deny causes us to automatically think about something we desire being held back from us, like being denied a job or a loan. It can also bring to mind the thought of having to refuse something that we really want. Because by human nature it isn’t easy to not get something we want or deny ourselves something, denial puts us in an uncomfortable position. And we don’t like being uncomfortable at all.

Lust is defined as a strong craving or hunger for something. It could involve a person, money, or power. How many times have you had your eye on something and in your mind, you were determined to gain possession of it? It could be something as simple as a candy bar at the supermarket checkout counter. Maybe it’s a new purse that just came out. Perhaps it is the latest iPhone you saw your coworker with. Or maybe it’s a little more complicated. Maybe it’s that businessman you constantly encounter every morning at Starbucks who compliments you consistently.

Though we can have a desire or wish to possess any or all of these types of things, the Bible teaches us that we have a choice. In the book of Titus, scripture states:

For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age. Titus 2:11-12 NIV

Titus 2:12 emphasizes that we must deny ungodliness and worldly passions (or lusts), meaning we must push back against any intense feelings we have for things that are not good for or beneficial to us.

Having a desire for simple pleasures like food, clothing, or affection is not a crime, but when we lean into and allow the desire for them to control us in a way that is not within God’s will, it is sin. The sinful nature of lust tempts us as individuals to be overcome by evil. Lust begins simply as a thought that can quickly escalate into dishonorable actions and spiritual death. The book of James teaches us:

When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. James 1:13-15 NIV

Lust, like any other sin, must be shut down in the beginning of the thought process. Dwelling on what we desire to obtain too long leads us down a dangerous road every single time. This is why Paul teaches us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV) to “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

So, let’s look at the most obvious road of sin that lust can lead us down – sexual sin.

When a person has an intense desire for someone else that is based upon a sexual attraction, it can easily snowball into an addiction. Operating from a place of lust, a person’s uncontrolled desires weaken his/her ability to eventually control his/her thoughts. Once his/her thought life becomes unbalanced, it allows powerful feelings to overtake them and they eventually fall into a place of darkness, easily committing a sinful action.

The Bible gives us many examples of this, but today, let’s look at the story of Amnon and his half-sister, Tamar, in 2 Samuel 13. This story shows how damaging giving in to lust can be.

Tamar was one of King David’s daughters. The Bible tells us that she was beautiful and innocent. The Bible also tells us that Amnon, her half-brother, became “obsessed” with her. Instead of following tradition and asking for Tamar to be his wife, he devised a plot to get her alone because he desired her sexually. Pretending to be ill, he asked David to send Tamar to take care of him. Tamar, unaware of Amnon’s lust for her or his evil intentions complies. Allowing his lustful thoughts to run free, Amnon rapes his half-sister and then discards her after his evil action. In fact, once he had slept with her, his feelings of desire turned to intense hatred for her. Shamed, Tamar lives out her days under the care of her full brother, Absalom (2 Samuel 13:1-21).

Amnon had allowed his lustful thoughts to convince him that he loved Tamar, but what was controlling him was not love, but an animal-like passion. Amnon was full of lust. By allowing the intense passion he had for his sister to take over his mind, he committed a dark and evil act, one that Tamar would have to live with forever. The desire to have his sister in such a way was so powerful that he lost complete control. And this act of unbridled passion would lead to his death two years later when Absalom avenged his sister’s shame and had Amnon killed.

Lust is truly destructive when left unchecked.

Let’s go a little deeper. Lust and love –it’s amazing how often people get these two actions confused and/or interchange them. Both words describe an intense feeling, but are so different in nature. Lust is all about obtaining for oneself, love is all about conveying something to others. Lust is of Satan; love is of God. Lust is a deadly sin. Love, on the other hand, is what God requires us to show others. Lust is evil; love is pure. Lust takes; love gives.

Galatians 5:16 states:

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. (NIV)

Lust must be denied, rejected, opposed. As Christians, we cannot allow lust to have control over our minds. Our only hope in overcoming lustful temptations is to “walk by the Spirit” and remain in Christ. By allowing Holy Spirit to lead and guide us, we can resist the enticing thoughts the enemy sends us. As we walk with God in faith, we can overcome the evil lusts of this world. We have a choice. My prayer is that we each remain in the Spirit, that we walk in God’s authority and boldness taking captive every thought, and that we cast down anything that is not of God. If we do, love wins.

Love & blessings, 

Melody